im a hopeless romantic and your just hopeless....

take me on or let me be
i dont want to be just another tragedy
another girl you led into your trap
sucked her dry then threw her back
i do not care to take the risk
so spare me the details
i just want the truth
are your eyes a lie?
is your kiss sincere?
i have been down this road before
i dont want it anymore
you may mean the world to me
just dont make me just another tragedy
a girl to add to the end of your list
i lean back to look at the stars
i turn the page and then read on
as the never ending tale
of a teenage romance comes slowly to an end
and then is gone


im in another one of those moods where the endless questions of life
just come to you one after another just begging for an answer which
is just unknown to you. i do not regret a thing in life but yet sometimes
i just wonder how things could be different if i just did that one little
thing or didnt do this, if i didnt forgive this person or never had gotten
mad just how things might be a little or maybe drastically changed.another
thing i wonder about is how people can be so brain washed by another person
who isnt even a true person at all and just using what little power they have
to cover their own fear and weaknesses.it personally confuses me and makes me
almost angry how people get lost in their own fears and in the act of all that
forget who they truly are themselves and forget their own voice as a human being.
i guess that is one thing that will just never go away.secondly i realize
how so many people hate reading about oh im in love with this guy but hes in love
with her but she is in love with that guy over there, but yet experience these
things and just keep them inside.i have been single for about six months
except for a week when i went out with this very nice person but it just wasnt
good timing or anything which didnt lead to a happy ending for the relationship
of us being anything more than friends,but as i sit here alone pouring my heart
and head into the words of this journal i am lonely.lonely but scared to get
into a relationship that may actually work for fear that i may get hurt. which
is very stupid and sounds very ridiculous i might also add,but its true.i
find myself almost judging other peoples relationships when i dont have one of
my own.in this entry i am also contradicting myself in some way
because the thing i am most afraid of is being alone which at this time
i am but i am scared to find someone who i may really enjoy being with.
i do really need to make up my mind.
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well i have in the 10 seconds since i wrote
that have made up my mind and the verdict is that i am not so much
looking for a relationship because you cant look for love but want
to be in a relationship.i pretty much already have the what,where,why,and when
the only part missing is the who?oh well i am done with my little emotional speech for today